I just shorted my first stock trade today

I’m telling you, it’s both boring and frustrating to try to learn stock trading and then it’s also kind of funky and exciting. I know this doesn’t sound like much of a woman’s blog in that I’m always talking about stocks and stuff these days but when I was into cooking or into making Halloween costumes for my children when they were little, my diaries were filled with those topics too. (Well, I’m still into cooking, even more so now, but I just am not so scared by it that I need to journal my way through it anymore; we didn’t have blogs then.)

Anyway, back to shorting stock trades. I’m still not making money but I’m still not losing money either. (At this minute, I’ve made $151 in profits year to date and I started four months ago, fulltime.) In fact today again I got another little booster regarding my nature just by listening to this TV station Jack found and which I listen to throughout most of the trading day now, which is from 9:30 a.m. and 4 p.m., but a lot of time has to go in before and after hours to research and decide what one wants to do.

Anyway, short trades (as opposed to long trades) are funny things and it was my first intentional short trade because my first one was a mistake, on which I made a whopping $5 (hey! Not too bad as mistakes go). My very first trade ever, I made a mistake and shorted a stock instead of buying it long, which means that I sold it first and then bought it at a lower price. (crazy shit, I know.)

I remember that day I was so damn scared. I couldn’t tell the difference between red, which means sell on my discount brokerage platform and green, which means buy on my platform. I’ve had lots of reasons to be scared in my life but this was a fear that I was pushing myself into, whereas other fearful situations usually came unbidden.

So anyway, back to what a short trade is: the short trade is when you think a stock is going to go down and if you sell it without owning it then you can make money when you buy it later at a lower price. You can sell it at the market price, which is the price it is now, even if you don’t own it yet. You’re basically borrowing it. Then, you wait hope and pray (after you’ve done all due diligence in your homework before and after hours) for the price to go down and then buy it at a lower price.

I can’t say I even get the whole thing well enough to explain it and I just called the trade desk because I was sure that I messed it up. They said I entered the trade correctly. If it goes down I will earn a grand total of 73.50 after trading costs.

*whew*

I have to say that there is something good here; I have always focused on areas so far from anything financial and yet I’ve always wanted to know what everyone else knows about money and this big giant called Wall Street and the world markets and macroeconomics and….

I feel like this is just what a peri-menopausal woman like me needs. I hate to admit it but I will—I want to feel like the main character in a book I read a very long time ago. It was titled, “Woman of Substance” and I can not remember the author at this time but it was a story of an old lady who started out with nothing when she was little.

Over the years and raising four children alone after several bad marriages she built an empire that she was able to share with her grandchildren. I always think of that story. I just do. (I’ll fill in the author at some point.) I’ve loved and lived for literary and journalistic pursuits but they do not fill this other need in me and this other need in me is to also experience the world of money and its muscle.

As I have said in earlier posts, I was raised that money was not something a lady concerned herself with but we were to just remain hard workers. There was good training there but I need to take it further.

I go through many bouts and fears regarding this latest pursuit because continuing to neglect financial possibilities in my life limits my life’s potential. That my significant other (SO) is a certified financial planner and wants to be the angel on my shoulder can not be ignored and hopefully someday I will not have to write every time about my fears and baby steps or feel the need to justify this new venture in my life because money and financial industries may not be the root of all evil.

After all, isn’t this the type of thing 48-year-old women do when their children grow up? Try new things, push off old and worn out values, wear purple?

(yes, I know, I’m still justifying and apologizing; I will stop this aggravating habit soon…but Mom would not approve of gambling with my life savings...er...I mean the proceeds from the sale of my house in the form of a divorce settlement...so no...I haven't told her for that and other reasons and she doesn't know I keep this blog...real big of me, hah?)